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View Full Version : I learned a new term for the Geriatric Dictionary

Mackadoody
06-03-2005, 01:07 PM
Okay... I am a pharmacist.

That being said, every once in a while, a patient will teach me something I don't know.

I had a patient come in and ask me for something for piles.
I looked at her blankly... What the HELL is piles I'm thinking.
She looks at me and repeats "Do you have anything for piles?"
"I'm not sure what your asking for."
"I can't believe you don't know the piles! Is there a pharmacist there?"
"I'm the pharmacist, I've never heard of the piles."
"How can you be a druggist and not now the piles! Anal piles?"
"Oh! You're talking about hemorroids!"
"That's what I said! Piles"

And Mack learned something new. I'm guessing some people call hemorroids, piles.

God, I love my job sometimes. (is it a full moon tonight?)


k. just needed to get that off my chest.
Wez
06-03-2005, 01:27 PM
Lol, I've heard the term piles before, never knew what it was though. Now I'm sorry I know. 8)
barks
06-03-2005, 01:31 PM
Got to love m-w.com
a mass of dilated veins in swollen tissue at the margin of the anus or nearby within the rectum -- usually used in plural; called also piles

http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/audio.pl?pile0001.wav=pile

http://www.m-w.com/cgi-bin/audio.pl?hemorr03.wav=hemorrhoid
Euroranger
06-03-2005, 01:37 PM
Dood...you shoulda directed her to the family planning aisle and recommended something like Astroglide...that and advise her to tell Mr. Piles to lay off the kinky crap for a time.

Woulda been ironic had she, in her rage at your "piles"-ignorance", called you an a-hole. :D
Mackadoody
06-03-2005, 01:50 PM
Yesterday, I had some guy tell me, "God will punish you!", after I unsuccessfully tried to tell him that the manufacturer that made his Warm & Form back brace is outta business.

Me: "That brace is a Warm & Form... it's no longer made anymore"
Dude: "Where can I get it then?"
Me: "The manufacturer who makes it is out of business, you can't get it."
Dude: "I need the wrap for the brace! This is the 3rd place that is screwing with me! I don't drive! I want to get this replaced"
Me: "As I said, there are similar products, but the Warm & Form is not made anymore:
Dude: "I don't want something similar, I want this one! Why won't you tell me where I can get it?"
Me: "It's not made anymore, you can't find it anywhere... The manufacturer is not in business anymore"
Dude (loudly): "I am talking to a brick wall! God will PUNISH you!"

Every once in a while, I get a run on fuggin' whackos.
Wez
06-03-2005, 02:02 PM
You outta put "Waiting for Gods punishment" in your sig. 8)
Fathercrew
06-03-2005, 02:16 PM
Dude (loudly): "I am talking to a brick wall! God will PUNISH you!"

Hey Mack . . If you ever hear a voice say "Mack . . this is God", RUN!

:D
Banshee
06-03-2005, 04:06 PM
Dude...Fucking loons everywhere!

Ive never heard that term before but im glad to say if I ever do at least now I wont have a blank stare.
TotalCarnage
06-03-2005, 05:29 PM
My god man, even I know what piles are :)
Vorgra
06-03-2005, 05:31 PM
My god man, even I know what piles are :)

:rolleyes: :eek:
Euroranger
06-03-2005, 05:40 PM
Mack, Mack, Mack...you seem like such a subtle, mild-mannered fellow on comms.

You probably didn't have it in you to look at the old crip whacko who said "God will punish you!" and reply with something like "Will it be worse than wasting good manners and an abundance of patience on the criminally stupid?". :p
Mackadoody
06-03-2005, 06:29 PM
In the past, I remember this one story of a nut.

My pharmacy is called Schwarz Pharmacy. My family bought it when the town was predominantly German/Italian.

Anyway, some guy bought Glucose Urinalysis strips. Brings them back, dried blood all over the bottle, box, and strips. Wanted to return them.
Apparently, he bought the urine test strips thinking that if he bled all over them, they'd magically tell him his blood glucose level.

Needless to say, we wouldn't take it back. The guy was so angry with me, he threw the crapped up merchandise on the counter. Told me "Fuck you! HITLER was RIGHT with you people! FUCKING JEWS!!! FUCKING JEWS!!!" and walked out before I was able to kick him out of the store.

It was wierd.
#1 I'm Chinese
#2 I didn't think old people were THAT crazy... and that people were still THAT anti-semetic.
Methuselah
06-06-2005, 10:01 AM
Anyone over 40 should know what "piles" are! I can't believe they didn't cover that in Pharmacy 101! :) Watch the shit about Geriatric folks, remember, there are some in this Guild, right Barks? ;)

Gramps...er...I mean Meth!
barks
06-06-2005, 10:08 AM
Anyone over 40 should know what "piles" are! I can't believe they didn't cover that in Pharmacy 101! :) Watch the shit about Geriatric folks, remember, there are some in this Guild, right Barks? ;)

Gramps...er...I mean Meth!
Hey, What did you say. Battery on my hearing aid is acting up. SPEAK LOUDER :D
Banshee
06-06-2005, 04:53 PM
My god man, even I know what piles are :)

Suffered long time dear?
Methuselah
06-06-2005, 05:38 PM
That's really funny because my Tribes I and II name was =PHB=Hemroyd

Meth
TotalCarnage
06-06-2005, 05:42 PM
Suffered long time dear?

considering some of the TWL admins I've had working for me um...yes..
Methuselah
06-07-2005, 09:13 AM
considering some of the TWL admins I've had working for me um...yes..

ZING!

Meth
Banshee
06-07-2005, 02:12 PM
lol